​Get curious before decided

Have you ever thought about what you would go back and tell your younger self?

Back in the day, I had a dream to make a career of travelling the world. I was so fascinated by cultures after spending a year away on an exchange program. But slowly over time the excitement over that idea turned into fear and hesitation.

That storyline doesn’t end with how I triumphed over that fear.

It ends with how I gave into it and regretted it sorely later on.

The thing that I regretted the most? The process of how I came to the conclusion that this exciting lifestyle was not a possibility for me.

What was my process?

Well, I looked at how anxious prone I was in my day-to-day life and just decided that I wasn’t the kind of person who was courageous enough to do it. I believed if I did try it out, that I would be so sick with worry the entire time about how to make money and how to stay safe as a female travelling alone, that I wouldn’t enjoy myself anyway. I anticipated feeling fearful in the future and decided that it just wouldn’t be worth it.

Can you imagine? Can you relate?

Looking back I am shocked at the blind spots I had. If only someone wise could have illuminated them and helped me make sense of them. The one I would have targeted first would have been my willingness to enter a state of curiosity before deciding.

Where I went wrong was I didn’t even TRY to imagine how to make a work-travel lifestyle possible. I didn’t talk to anyone, do any research, gather stories, look for role models, brainstorm…nothing.

The same went for how to overcome my anxiety and become a brave person who felt confident about looking after herself. I didn’t even try and imagine it was possible I could be any other way and took no further action to explore a solution.

I decided who I was. And that was that.

Making that choice radically determined the path my life would take.

So my questions for you today are:

  • what are you deciding on before you allow yourself to be in a state of curiosity?
  • What would allowing yourself to be in a state of curiosity look like?
  • Who would you be if you imagined there was a secure path to becoming that person?
  • Who we decide we are, who we decide we aren’t, and who we decide we can be determines everything.

Choosing to be curious first also changes everything.

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