Be a Finisher series is all about giving you radical secrets to help move you into finishing what you start, stop procrastinating and get into confident, focused action. You can read or watch the series if you prefer.
The secret that I’m going to share today, and every secret I’m going to share from Monday through Friday, felt radical to me initially when I started to apply it to my life.
But the benefit when I did was that I moved out of my procrastinating ways, my hesitation, and really moved into a new way of being, of flowing with life, really getting into momentum, and really holding myself accountable to my own dreams and being the designer of my life and my business.
So, are you guys ready for secret number one?
Radical secret number one is radical self-responsibility.
This phrase changed my life: You are 100% responsible for everything in your life and not in your life.
When I heard this phrase, my initial reaction was like, oh no. Don’t even try and tell me that. Like my first initial reaction was, that is crazy. Especially being a systems thinker, a systemic thinker, knowing about a lot of how things are interweaved in the world. I was like, no. That’s not right. Blah, blah. Okay? So, my initial resistance was push it away.
But, when I asked myself, well, what if? What if I applied this to my life? I’m 100% responsible for everything in my life and not in my life. What would happen?
Because really what do you lose?
What do you lose when you say I’m 100% responsible for everything in my life and not in my life and you start to move in the world in that way? You only have to find out. Right?
So, what did I find out when I applied this?
Let me give you an example…
When I bumped up against someone who I felt was being unsupportive of my dream, and I asked that question like, okay, this person is showing up in my life saying things in a way that I don’t feel supported by, I feel demotivated by. And what I really want is this person to support me. And, when I looked at it through this lens, I’m 100% responsible for this person being in my life and supporting me, what did that mean?
That meant that I had to take responsibility for telling them what I needed.
Yeah. I had to take responsibility for telling them what I needed to hear, how I felt supported or not.
Because, guess what? That person didn’t know.
That person didn’t know what words of affirmation to give me. They didn’t know that what they were saying in my field of interpretation, how I was interpreting it felt demotivating.
So, guess what? I took responsibility to say, hey, you know what?
When you say these things, this is how I take them. And, even though I know I’m interpreting them this way, what I really appreciate from you, I know you want to support me.
How I feel best supported is when you say X, Y, Z, or when you do X, Y, Z.
So, do you see how I moved into a position of taking responsibility for that relationship?
And I could have spent eternity just being completely upset and being like, okay, you know what? I’m just going to cut this person out of my life because they’re toxic, blah, blah, blah. Right? Well, sometimes you can’t do that, especially if that person is a family member and especially if you like that person. Right? You just don’t like how they’re talking to you or supporting you.
“I’m 100% responsible for everything in my life and not in my life” allowed me to step into greater ownership of designing that relationship with person. And you know what happened?
They rose to the occasion.
Let’s talk about another example from the field and the viewpoint of manifestation.
Those who are really open to the ideas of manifestation, one of the beliefs is that the universe is here to support us and that we can ask the universe to help us, to bring us things that serve our highest good.
Now, when you say I’m 100% responsible for everything in my life and not in my life, guess what?
It is your responsibility to ask the universe to help you serve your highest good, to bring you things that will unblock you, solve something, open your eyes, open opportunities.
Because without asking, how do we receive? Without asking, without saying and actually using ourselves as a tool of communication with the universe and taking responsibility for that, ask and taking responsibility for that receiving, if we don’t do that, we stop that flow. Okay? So, I can ask the universe to send me things.
When you think of all the times you may have unconsciously asked the universe for help, what showed up?
We often forget that we can ask. I even do this too.
So, as a very ambitious, focused person now, I have to keep a balance. I know that I am 100% the director of my life. And, at the same time, I know that I am in partnership with the universe and I’m responsible for that partnership, which means asking and receiving and not just doing and planning all on my own!
So, this is an interesting kind of twist. Right? It’s a radical kind of concept that, even though the universe supports you, you are still responsible for navigating and activating that relationship.
So, you get to ask the universe to send you things.
If you’re bumping up against, let’s say, a health issue, you’re bumping up against a health issue and you have tried so many different practitioners, so many different ways to try and heal yourself, and it’s just still not happening, you can ask the universe to send you, send you the healers that are there for your highest good.
Ask the universe to send you what or who, give you a sign that leads you into our full, abundant health.
And, by asking and taking ownership of that, taking responsibility for asking, you will draw to you.
The universe will deliver the next step. It might not be the complete step, but it could be like the right step for you to the next step, to the next step, or the person, to this person, to this person.
That has happened multiple times in my life.
Asking the universe to send me mentors, to lead me and guide me to the next step, the next person who can help me fully open up and expand my spirituality, my spiritual side. So, this works beautifully.
So, you guys, the phrase, I am 100% responsible for everything in my life and not in my life, this is radical self-responsibility.
This is secret number one to being a finisher.
Radical self-responsibility is not necessarily easy, but it can be so rewarding when you take this position and you start to use this question in your life on a day to day basis.
Now, tomorrow I am going to talk about something that is going to help this feel a little bit softer because, guess what?
I know I’m talking to perfectionist prone, ambitious, heart led humans who have a big vision of like saving the world sometimes.
And sometimes we’re prone to making EVERYTHING and EVERYONE ELSE our responsibility too, in a huge big overwhelming way.
Us perfectionists also tend to self-sabotage with self-criticism when we don’t meet our crazy high standards. So taking 100% self-responsibility can easily end up feeling burdensome and like you’re never doing enough!
Well, tomorrow’s Be A Fisher Secret Number 2 is going to help with that. So be sure to watch the livestream at 8:00am PDT on my Five Sights Co Facebook page by clicking here or checking out the next blog post!